Reworking the math and measurements.

I’m taking advantage of the fact that my computer seems to be in a jolly good mood today.
A whole bunch of things happened from 230609-060709.
I’m too lazy to list down the 758320485 things but mainly, my birthday, mum’s birthday and many little little things that constitute the other main things(: Oh shoots, before I came to this page to type out my post, I really had tons to write about, but now, when I’m on the page, I can’t really seem to organize my thoughts properly. Okay, this really isn’t working, ’cause all the little snippets that I had in my brain when I’m on the page, is now all gone. Probably, numbering my help!(:

1) I ran 5km yesterday at MacRitchie, great accomplishment indeed. (I just feel so inclined to boast about it:p)
2) I drank my favourite lotus soup, brewed by ah ma, ate my favourite fish noodles and butterfly bun for breakfast(:
3) I had a nightmare on Saturday night whereby, my maid was killed, I was almost killed and I couldn’t open my eyes to stop the whole nightmare.
4) Mr Nah was racing Bern, Mei qi, Eunice and I to the Chem lab and he stuck out his hand so that I couldn’t overtake him. lol.
5) We changed seats and I’m sitting with kaijun(:
6) Sports day is cancelled ’cause of the stupid pig which brings flu around. Okay, the pig isn’t stupid, it’s the flu. The efforts, the time, the props etc, but there might still be one at a later date.
7) I’m getting more impatient with my fingers during piano lessons. It pisses everyone off, mainly, my teacher and I.
Bro and I bought Mum a cake. Technically, I bought Mum a cake. I went to buy it, the money which I used to buy the cake was mine and all my bro did was just to agree that he was going to buy a cake with me. And that stupid boy was so lazy to even do up a card for her. Pfft. But nehmind, she was touched(:
9) It was my birthday which so coincidentally was the day of guides carnival. Went out with Vanes and Esther and I’ve pictures for this bullet!

You see pink!

Observe diameters of mouth.

Observe length of tongue.

1, 2, 3.

The friendship(:

Thank you for all the birthday greetings and presents and hugs(:

10) This is quite unimportant, but I said little little things, and this is a little little thing. I discovered a very nice flavour for bubble tea. PEACH RED/GREEN TEA. Now, I prefer that to milk tea, and Esther’s influenced too!
10) I think that’s about all!

And numbering really helps:D Like so much! I smell foooood, so it’s lunch and the I’m going to spent this lazy afternoon with math, which I have totally no drive in doing any of it.

Tag replies! : (this are friggin’ late. sorry!)
Benghost]
Hello ghost! TSK, fell asleep after seeing it?! what a friend! haha, thanks(:

Vanes]
My stomach’s not lousy okay, it’s really thepig intestines!

For those that I didn’t reply I think I replied in person, or over MSN/blog, or something, so it’s not that I don’t want to reply okay:D OKAY!

We’re a picture in my mind

My brother has been really kind enough to loan his computer to me since mine’s cranky(: Again.D: He’s nice but to a certain extent, since I’m only given 20 mins to stick my butt on the swivel in front of his computer so this shall be a quickie post.
I realise that I like to take my blog titles from certain meaningful/random lines off a song that I’m listening to. Today’s song is I Will Remember You by Ryan Cabrera. A good singer ’cause I like his songs. Simple, nice, sweet.

Guides camp.
It was really awesome. I don’t exactly know how to put my feelings down in words but I’m really thankful for the fact that we had camp this year. Even though it was extended by one more day, it was all worthwhile. First thinking that I wouldn’t pull through because of all the physical torture that I would be put through but when it ended, you don’t know just how much I learn from it. I don’t know what’s the difference between this year’s camp and the other years, but for once, I really dare to say that I truly enjoyed myself and it made me think alot. A thought provoking camp which made me reflect about these 3 years in SNGG and everything; all those ups and downs. I find myself slowly, very slowly getting that feeling stirred up in me, something that I never felt last time, at that time. Subconsciously, that feeling sneaks into me like a thief, robbing all those unhappiness and dislike away and putting in place, admiration, joyfulness, appreciation and passion.

It’s just weird how some feelings just get into you at this point of time and not at another. Sometimes, it comes late, like an unpunctual friend who made you wait at the bus stop for 1/2 an hour. Just that time difference of having that feeling affects decisions, important decisions that you make. You got that feeling before? I feel awkwardly uncomfortable feeling and sensing that feeling ’cause I know that I’m not allowed/supposed to feel that way at this time. I really do. Yeah, that’s guides camp. There was definitely fun, adventure, patrol-cool-thing (EXCALIBUR) and all sorts. I just thought that my biggest takeaway was that, all those feelings and stuff. It was probably too overwhelming to see it all come soaring back to me. But like what Tracy said, it’s an experience that very few would get to know. Bad experience, decision making true, but at the end of the day, I know it pulled me through and made me stronger. I mean, we always get stronger each time when we hit setbacks right. The harder this setback make you fall, the stronger you get and I think I really can’t deny that. Well, aren’t I in the process of that now? I gotta really thank Tracy for helping me through all this, Thanks Tracy<3 It’s really time to pick myself up, move on and concentrate on the other important happenings in my life now. For example, my dreaded and horrendous studies. (June holidays weren’t kind to my physical and mental health at all.)

Job attachment.
Today was the first day with SMRT.
It was quite a fine day today. Jessica and Lydia, the 2 people working there who are suppose to be “looking after” us during this week, turn out to be really nice and witty humans(: This job thingy is another good experience. The fact that the holidays are coming to an end and so far, all that’s gone has been swallowed up by the time monster and the last week of the holidays is for job attachment so I’m basically left with no time to have time with myself and other humans. Studying’s another issue too. But yeah, we weren’t really very excited for it, but I think after the first day, it doesn’t seem that bad(: Funny and retarded things happened today but due to the limited time that I’m given, I shan’t elaborate further!

Oh, ai sent me this message about going to some website an voting for schools to be closed for another week due to H1N1 and according to the message, it seems like it’s on the the channel news asia webpage, unless I got it wrong. hahah. This is a long post and I wanna put a picture up but all of them is still with wenting and ai, so yeah, gotta wait!

Quick Tag Replies:
Ashley]
Please, you are the one that doesn’t make ALL THE SENSE IN THE WORLD. Just look at what you wrote and you will know what I’m talking about:D Tsk, what mothballs!

Tay]
Hey! Mhm, of course you gotta feel touched. I really blogged ’cause you asked me too you know! Love you too, GIRAFFE<3

Alex]
I’m serious! I really do like it, so sweet and yummy!

How you remind me.

MUAH CHEE/MUA JI!
My awesome awesome ah ma made muah chee/mua ji for me!:D
She’s such a fantastic ah ma.
She always seem to come at the right times when I’m feeling sad and stressed and frustrated and tired to give me my favourite food to calm my disturbed and distraught soul.

Thank you ah ma!(:

Oh boy, since I’ve already started a little of posting then I should just continue.
This week was as usual, busy. Busy with going to school, busy with guides, busy with homework, busy with piano, busy with everything else except sleep. I feel sleep deprived even when it’s the holidays.
But today, was a little different(: The stuff that I did today, were more lighthearted and not stress inducing and other stuff. Oh shoots, the blister on my finger just burst ’cause I was jabbing it a few minutes ago. yucks.

Neway, it was green house props-making in the morning with Eunice. She’s downright retarded and she laughs at all the things that she’s not suppose to and stones at all the things that she’s suppose to laugh at. Crapped and laughed and played with those green feathers. hahah.

Afternoon, was spent with tay the giraffe doing cip at NKF.
The bus ride there was freaky and scary and traumatising. Yes, very traumatising. There was this really weird person that constantly looked and smiled at us. At first, we, being friendly people, said hi and smiled back. But after a while, that person just kept smiling and smiling and staring and staring. & this was when we got a little scared. We thought that he was going to stalk us, then we thought. What if he alights at the same bus stop as us or what if he just started following us or what if he does something? Then giraffe and I were thinking of ways to “attack” this person if he ever comes near us. But in the end, he alighted the stop before us and we really heaved a sigh of relief. It was like “Oh, Thank God.” HAHAHAH. ohoh, then there was this really weird couple beside giraffe. That’s another hilarious story, which I don’t feel like telling(:

Both of our eyes were losing out of control after sitting down, staring at the computer, keying in data information for 3 an a half hours. Imagine that stiffness and ache-ness in your back when you stand up. I’m never going to do a desk bound job. It’ll kill me and drive me to nuts. When we entered the lift, giraffe had this sudden desire to take pictures of our reflections in the mirror. The lift had mirrors. Cool eh. But since, we were going down from the 5th floor, there wasn’t much time since I didn’t get my phone out yet. So I asked giraffe to press the “open lift doors” button, get out of the lift and get everything ready first.

When the lift came again, we stepped in and giraffe went “Let’s go all the way up to the highest level so we will have alot more time” HAHAHAHA, that was really funny funny funny! Tay was really funny, her expression then was just so…priceless.

Giraffe requested me to blog about this awesome day with her and yeah, I just did. Ain’t I obedient?:D TAY QI HONG, THANK YOU FOR TODAY:D

The shoe swopping pair(:

Now, it’s time to get busy with guides stuff again. Oh gosh, the worries are flooding me again D: CHILL CHILL CHILL. I think I’ll go get an ice cube to chill offfffff.

Pig intestines.

My tummy’s really in a great deal of pain.
I
HATE
PIG
INTESTINES.
I’m never going near it ever again. forever.

The weather’s crap. Crappy crap.

There goes the first week of holidays. Isn’t it fast? Fast as lightening. Things just happen and come by so fast that they disappear so fast too.

I’m stuck at e.geog graded. It seems so difficult to comprehend the figure of a cross section of a river channel that has been “produced by a computer based upon fieldwork measurements”. What the poo.
I’m not following my timetable. And that’s really bad. It’s not motivation that I’m losing, it’s just that everytime when I try to follow it, something unexpected crops up and it disrupts my whole schedule of homework for that day. The homework’s just being pushed back day after day, accumulating enough to build a hill.
But at least for today, I feel accomplished!:D Finally, managed to buy the cloth and get those meal bags. The only missing thing now is their ponchos and I have to go all the way to the army market at bras basah to get them. That’s totally good news for me man.

The most awesome thing that happened today was that I got to the textile shop at yishun without getting lost:D It seems like a really small thing to the street smarts, but for me, who has negligible sense of direction, is a great big thing! At first, I thought I was lost ’cause I was worried that I wouldn’t stop at the right stop but when I reached, I knew all my worries were just so uncalled for. The next most awesome thing was that I met up with vanes, after such a long time!:D vanes sim, you should be feeling so honoured now and if you are not then something must be awfully wrong. Met at plaza sing’s daiso to get their meal bags. There’s actually a direct bus that goes there from yishun. Is that cool or what! And I really love long bus rides, I reflected quite alot(: Actually, it’s more of stoning. Whatever it is, I enjoyed it.
We actually didn’t made any plans before to meet up, it was all last minute, but I’m glad that we could really meet, even if it was just that few hours(:
Had lunch and it was also the first time that I ate “kuey chap”(however you spell it) with pig intestines. The noodles stuff was not too bad, so were the taugua and the rest on the plate EXCEPT for the pig intestines D: I think it’s because I ate the pig intestines that’s causing my tummy to feel weird now. But I think lunch was still good!

Our talk during lunch was dense. I don’t know why but we weren’t talking about crap and retarded and weird and funny etc stuff like we usually do. We were really talking about. our lives? what’s happening? It’s like 2 good ‘ol friends meeting after a really long time and trying to catch up with the latest updates of the other friend’s life kind of thing. I think we were reflecting and sometimes, I really do like it(: Yeah, you get the idea.

No matter how reluctant I was, I still took the mrt home ’cause I couldn’t find any other way to get home and the moment I got onto the train, I regretted it. I felt nauseous all over and I really don’t like the train. It feels trapped and suffocating. It’s weird to feel that way even when the train’s not crowded, but I still feel it. & that just explains why I don’t like taking trains and not daring to take trains on my own. Rah, it sounds stupid but everyone has their own weird fears now and then, & mine’s just the stupid train thing!
My stomach’s still acting funny and it’s like a big fat balloon. If I was a balloon, let me fly away, far far away.

Back to you.

I just took this “What’s animal were you in a past life “quiz on facebook and I turned out to be a stupid, freaking cat. Imagine myself hating myself in the past life. That would be really horrid. & now, that animal’s face is on My Wall and I seriously can’t bear to bring myself to look at it. I need to find a way to delete it and I don’t even know if it’s possible.RAH. After looking at the picture of that animal, it intensified my dislike for that animal. I’m trying to delete it. Trying, trying and trying BUT IT’S NOT WORKING D: Fine, I shall not look at my profile page until that picture of that animal disappears. Okay, problem solved!

ooooo, there’s school tomorrow. How surprising. I had a nap in the afternoon. again, for 2 hours. My mum thinks that I’m crazy since I’ve taken a liking to napping. Was talking to Esther over the phone and I said “Sometimes, I feel that when I’m about to start on my work/study for tests/crack my brain ’cause I can’t handle logs etc, is the start of a no lifer me. While, getting ready to go to bed/sleep/nap is the start of a lively life me.” It’s like when I know that I’m about to sleep, I feel like I’m doing something meaningful in the whole day ’cause I’m finally letting my body and mind rest. hahahaha. That’s just some warped theory of mine which doesn’t make sense but still makes some sense. It’s just trying to show how I really can’t stand studying the whole day.

Was on ting xie the whole day and I’m still not done with cheng yu and a.math prac was just. No comments. Logs just doesn’t like me. But it’s alright, I don’t like it either:D Oh gosh, I’m getting out of facebook (I seem to see that picture of that animal everywhere) so I’ll get out of here too!
GOODNIGHT NON-THAT ANIMALS!

Quit doing that.

and dream, tomorrow's on its way.

“If you have a great ambition,
take as big a step as possible in the direction of fufilling it,
but if the stop is only a tiny one,
don’t worry if it is the largest one now possible.”
-Mildred McAffee

I’m not suppose to be here but I’m still here. who cares man:D
Stupid chem and a.math tests. Why the poo do they have to fall on the same day? It feels terrorizing somehow. Furthermore, I’m seriously not in any mood to study which probably explains why I’m here. I’m slowly, very slowly, falling into the holiday mood. Okay, not falling, I’m in it already and I can’t pluck myself out from it. C’mon, it’s the LAST week of school people, why are there still so many tests D: Nehmind, at least there’s Much Ado About Nothing to look forward to(: RAH, I still don’t like the terrorizing feeling.

Oh poot, I lost my correction fluid and eraser. Of late, I’ve been losing things (including my memory). I don’t know why, things just fly away without my knowledge and it’s a terrible feeling to find out that you’ve lost something. I feel that those 2 things are just somewhere. Somewhere, either in school or home. I just got to find that somewhere. hmm, I’m thinking. What if one day we lose something that we can never find? Something so intangible, so close to you, so. I don’t know, I can’t think of the right adjectives to fit this now. There will most probably be like a gap just like how he felt. I’m reminded of yesterday’s convo. I guess, that’s life for you but still embrace in it, my friend.

I was just looking at my previous archives and I realise the way I blogged last time is a tad different from the way I blog now. It seems so messy. I can’t pinpoint what’s the difference, but there definitely is one. But either way, I prefer my blogging style now. & there are so many pop ups asking me to play some game which evidently I do not play games. So stop popping out, it scares. deeedle doodle toodle, okay I can’t remember what else I wanted to blog (see, my memory’s “losing”) so I shall go and learn ting xie which I believe will not be a very huge success. There’s always a tendency of falling asleep when I study for tests.

Oh yes, Kris Allen won(:

It’s like

This.
Mummy’s CD playing.
The cars passing by.
The fan spinning round and round.
These sounds, so familiar.

Heh, I don’t know why I talked about sounds, just suddenly wanted to(:
Was just looking through the pictures that we took when we went for a family trip at US last year. & I terribly miss those days. It was really fun time spent with mummy, papa and xuan. Really valuable family time that we seldom get back here at Singapore. Everyone’s so busy with work and plus the hustle and bustle of everyday, we all get so tired when we reach home.

When we go for our year end holiday trips, everyone’s relaxed and chilled. Paps isn’t busy on his laptop checking mails or on the phone talking to his clients, Mummy isn’t busy looking at every corner of the house or asking us to drink some chinese herbal thing(which she has cleverly picked up this “skill” from my grandma), xuan isn’t busy on the computer and playing his games to kill some monster and I wouldn’t be busy sleeping or doing work.

Singapore should have this one week holiday that is solely for family bonding. First, families get to bond; second, we students won’t go blind by studying for our countless test; third, parents won’t have to work. It’s like killing 3 birds with 1 stone. In fact, I think it’s more than 3. It’s the time that we all need but is seldom granted.

My mum didn’t speak to me about some kind of family value thing but it’s the small little things that she has been doing which really made me realise that I have been neglecting my family. & it somehow hit on me, that I’m not going to continue to do that ’cause I guess, it hurts to be neglected. Furthermore, we are the Tan Family so the 4 of us makes us F-A-M-I-L-Y, no matter what happens(:
It’s all me and my reflective side again. I like it when I reflect ’cause that’s when I see all my faults. Not that it’s nice seeing your faults but it allows you to change for the better.

Oh oh, isn’t that image up there cooler now! It’s paps orange sunglasses which I took while he was skiing up there, in the mountains of US. Really, those times, I really do miss them.

Family's like jam sticking 2 pieces of bread together; forever.

Pig in.

Sweetie cakes(:

It was night after piano.
A blistered feet,
a trip to ah ma’s house.

Family feeling.
Zeph and Mei mei,
Ah ma and Xiao Gu.

I traded math time for some family time and a smile.
It was worth it.

And I told myself,
this is probably one of the reasons why I’m still living. Living for my life and family and not for stupid tests and school.

Today’s mummy was a far cry from yesterday’s mummy.
Things seem pretty normal right now and I really hope it stays this way.
I really don’t like it when my mum starts yelling and we both piss each other off and not talk for days.
Family needs communication, mutual understanding and of course, love. I’ll try my best not to piss her off so she won’t get pissed (which upsets my dad and then my brother somehow gets involved) and then we will be a happy family(:

Oh, we met up with vanes yesterday after guides(:
A really good catch up besides the fact that I kept slipping into sian/stone mood. Yesterday, was really not one of my best. Let’s hope such days won’t happen that often! It felt really good to able to see vanes again since we didn’t see each other for a long time and I bet, June hols wouldn’t be any better. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, SIM VANESSA!:D and HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO YOU TOO, SONG AILYNN!:D

Time check:5:15.
Crap. I haven’t done any work since last night till now. But I was with family the whole day, so it’s not too bad(:Gah, but still, we are at this again. Work, school, test, stress. Isn’t there anything new?

C’mon, Grant me something to cling on.

The image up there.

Okay, the image up there isn’t very nice but just endure with it and I’ll put a pretty one up there soon(:

Goodnight and lit and a.math don’t want to be good friends with me and there’s school tomorrow D: & the thing is, I’m really not feeling any tinge of guilt/sadness/whatever-that-I’m-suppose-to-feel-when-I-don’t-do-any-school
-related-stuff-over-a-longgg-weekend.